Friday, March 19, 2010

Callis-English Dictionary, Part 1

There is a rare and demanding language that we, as James Callis fans, must learn to decipher. I like to call it simply "Callis". After watching so many interviews and transcribing some of them, I consider myself something of a connoisseur of this language. Being the humble, noble person I am, I've decided to give the world the gift of a Callis-English dictionary. Let's start with some simple phrases.

Callis:
"That is a good question."
English:
"That is a question."

Callis:
"That is a GREAT question."
English:
"I'm not sure I understood your question."

Callis:
"There's this thing in Shakespeare..."
English:
"I digress, but did you know I got an education in literature? Shakespeare Shakespeare Shakespeare!"

Callis:
"I haven't seen the film yet..."
English:
"I saw it and oh god, what was I thinking?!"

Callis:
"Our WONDERFUL director..."
English:
"..who is probably reading this. I wouldn't want to burn any bridges."

Callis:
"The Audi ad was so much fun."
English:
"Ka-ching!"

Callis:
"It's definitely more for teenagers than BSG."
English:
"It's vastly inferior to BSG."

Callis:
"It's shot in Vancouver, which is great. I love Vancouver."
English:
"It is my only reason for taking the job."

Callis:
"on some level"/"on a very big level"/"on every level"/whatever with "level"
English:
This is a specific, often repeated feature of the Callis language, and it seems to serve as an equivalent for the "Intrusive Dash" used in written Callis. In other words, rather than strictly mean something, it serves as a divider between words and clauses.

I'll make fun of myself too, just to be fair. So here are a few Denis-English translations for those who want to decipher MY challenging and beautiful language, which I am the foremost expert on. Ahem.

Denis:
"James is brilliant in this film."
English:
"James is in this film."

Denis:
"He looks GREAT!"
English:
"He looks fatter, which is great."

Denis:
"I came upon this old James project..."
English:
"I broke every copyright law in the world to get it."

Denis:
"I came upon this on a random google search.."
English:
"I spent five frakking hours searching for more donut quotes and all I found was this. Frak!"

Denis:
"I respectfully disagree."
English:
"You don't see the genius of James and therefore you are an idiot."

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